Maybe it is due to the westerly wind that seems to resist me from going forward or, maybe it is the flat Meseta which doesn’t seem to offer me a sense of progress. Whatever the reason is I am weary all the way to the bone today. I couldn’t find any consolation why I am walking and where exactly I want to arrive. There was only this disheartening thought that dominated my mind while I was walking from Fromista to Carrion de Los Condes today. I have no destination! Under this notion of going ‘no where’ what should only be 13 miles walk seemed eternity and I couldn’t bear the oppressing wind that constantly whispered to me to “stop”. After numerous attempts to pull myself out of this pit (none of which worked) I finally (because there was no other option) surrendered to the ‘pit’ and decided to let it run its course through me. A sense of failure overwhelmed me, along with anger, jealousy and all those feelings I have been relentlessly fending off from consuming me. Yet, I decided to stick to my (only) plan and silently repeated the word ‘no conflict’. I will stay in this pit for now, without any conflict. As we came into the Carrion de Los Condes I stepped into the church of Santa Maria del Camino, set in the pew and offered my heavy heart: Lord, help me to accept myself as I am, without exerting so much effort to fix it, without wanting to be someone other than who I am. Lord, help me to unburden my former toil and as you instructed, ‘to shake dust off of my sandals and move on’. The westerly wind was still blowing hard when I came out of the church and a few rays of sunshine greeted me with faint warmth. I leaned over to my walking poles once again and joined J to find an albergue for the night. I think it is called Espiritu Santo. I could definitely use it!